Which is the better of the two? military or civilian divorce?

Question

My husband is a First Sergeant in the Army. We have been married for 19 years. We live in the state of PA. I have never worked any substantial job during our marriage because he traveled a lot and I stayed home with our daughter and took.care of our home. (She is 18 now.). We have a marriage separation agreement Affidavit which pays for everything my daughter and I need. This was signed by a notary because the state of PA does not recognize Legal Separation. My husband doesn't care about getting a divorce, ( This makes me suspicious.) because he knows we need medical insurance. I also found out after this affidavit was signed that he has been having an affair for six months. I'm confused. I don't want to screw up all the money he is agreeing to pay by ticking him off, but...I have to be absolutely sure that it will stand in court if it is broken. With him being a First Sergeant, I don't want him finding out that I went to his Commanding officer for advice or to the JAG. The lawyer, however that I found who knows his military stuff is $500.00 1st visit with a 2,000.00 retainer fee. Which direction should I go? Also, what benefits might I receive if I go the military route vs civilian?

Answer 1

Ther is no such thing as a military divorce it is a civilian matter that is handled by the state. You could keep your full benefits including ID card, Tricare and part of his retirement if you have been married 20 years or longer and he has been active at least 20. But with you having a separation agreement his lawyer can then argue against it and win so then you lose the ID card and Tricare only having up to 50% of his pension when he gets it. As your child is over 18 he is under no child support obligation.



For lawyers call around often you can get the first 1 hour for free then pay after that. The $2000 retainer is around average as it can be between $1500-$3000 depending on the case.



If you want to push adultery then you can be he can and will file for divorce and you will not be left with much. Go to school, get work experience, save money and be prepared for when it does happen as it will.

Answer 2

You need to stay on the civilian side and don't go the military route. Divorce is strictly a civilian matter. The military is not going to get involved. All JAG will do is give you a list of local divorce lawyers and tell you to go talk to them.



But your statements do not make sense. You do realize that if you do get a divorce, you and your daughter stop having medical insurance. Maybe that's why he doesn't want a divorce right now.

Answer 3

Like others said, there is no Military divorce. You'll get child care, alimony and all that stuff. One thing that would make your ex really pissed is this. You can get 50% of his retirment if you've been married over 10 years (you have) of active duty (you have). Enjoy your free retirment.

Answer 4

there is no such thing as a military divorce. doesnotmatter if he is in the military or not. Both must gothru the local court system in the county you live.and I talk from personal experience.